Modesty in Dress |
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This page contains comments from the following authors:
Encyclopedia of Mormonism
For the Strength of Youth Pamphet
BYU Honor Code
W. John Walsh
Carol B. Thomas
President Spencer W. Kimball
Elder Bruce R. McConkie
President James E. Faust
Latter-day Saints believe that modest dress reflects commitment to a Christlike life and shows respect for self, for fellow beings, and for God. In their homes and in the Church, they are taught that modest dress has a positive effect on both self-esteem and behavior.
According to LDS theology, the body is more than a biological entity; it is a temple that houses an eternal spirit (cf. 1 Cor. 3:16-17). Physical intimacy is reserved for marriage (see Chastity). Modest dress serves as a physical and spiritual guard against immoral behavior and its inherent physical, emotional, and spiritual harm. Because modesty in dress cannot be reduced to a matter of particular styles, individuals are encouraged to use discretion to determine appropriate dress in varying situations.
Emphasizing the importance of modest dress, President Spencer W. Kimball stated, "I am positive that personal grooming and cleanliness, as well as the clothes we wear, can be tremendous factors in the standards we set and follow on the pathway to immortality and eternal life" (1979, p. 3).
Bibliography
Kimball, Spencer W. Faith Precedes the Miracle, pp. 161-68. Salt Lake City, 1972.
Kimball, Spencer W. "On My Honor." Ensign 9 (Apr. 1979):3.
Encyclopedia of Mormonism, Vol. 2, Modesty In Dress
Copyright © 1992 by Macmillan Publishing Company
Servants of God have always counseled his children to dress modestly to show respect for him and for themselves. Because the way you dress sends messages about yourself to others and often influences the way you and others act, you should dress in such a way as to bring out the best in yourself and those around you. However, if you wear an immodest bathing suit because it's "the style," it sends a message that you are using your body to get attention and approval, and that modesty is not important.
Immodest clothing includes short shorts, tight pants, and other revealing attire. Young women should refrain from wearing off-the-shoulder, low-cut, or revealing clothes. Young men should similarly maintain modesty in their dress. All should avoid tight fitting or revealing clothes and extremes in clothing and appearance.
As Latter-day Saint youth, you can also show respect for the Lord and yourselves by dressing appropriately for Church meetings and activities, whether on Sunday or during the week. If you are not sure what's appropriate, ask for guidelines from your parents, advisers, and bishop.
(See For the Strength of Youth pamphet)
The dress and grooming of both men and women should always be modest, neat, and clean consistent with the dignity adherent to representing The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and any of its institutions of higher learning.
Modesty and cleanliness are important values that reflect personal dignity and integrity, through which students, staff, and faculty represent the principles and standards of the Church. Members of the BYU community commit themselves to observe the standards, which reflect the direction given by the Board of Trustees and the Church publication For the Strength of Youth. The BYU Dress and Grooming Standards are as follows:
Men
A clean and well-cared-for appearance should be maintained. Clothing is inappropriate when it is sleeveless, revealing, or form fitting. Shorts must be knee length or longer. Hairstyles should be clean and neat, avoiding extreme styles or colors, and trimmed above the collar leaving the ear uncovered. Sideburns should not extend below the earlobe or onto the cheek. If worn, moustaches should be neatly trimmed and may not extend beyond or below the corners of the mouth. Men are expected to be clean shaven; beards are not acceptable. Earrings and other body piercing are not acceptable. Shoes should be worn in all public campus areas.
Women
A clean and well-cared-for appearance should be maintained. Clothing is inappropriate when it is sleeveless, strapless, backless, or revealing; has slits above the knee; or is form fitting. Dresses, skirts, and shorts must be knee length or longer. Hairstyles should be clean and neat, avoiding extremes in styles and colors. Excessive ear piercing (more than two per ear) and all other body piercing are not acceptable. Shoes should be worn in all public campus areas.
What is immodest attire? Immodest attire is that state of dress (or undress) which flaunts a person's body and sexuality. There are four questions one can ask to determine if a particular outfit is immodest:
(1) Does the outfit create greater interest in the wearer by potential sexual partners? Most of us know that girls in two piece swimming suits (i.e., "bikinis") are more interesting to men than girls wearing modest suits. (See footnote 1) If more potential sexual partners pay attention to you because of your dress or undress, then you know you are being immodest. No one except a spouse has the right to arouse sexual feelings in someone.
(2) Does the outfit make members of the same sex more conscious of their physical inadequacies? If your dress causes feelings of inadequacy in others, then you know you are being immodest. It is not Christian conduct to make other people feel bad because they were not blessed with your physical bounties.
(3) Why are you wearing or buying the outfit? In reality, most of us know what is immodest attire. When we choose a two piece swimming suit over a modest one piece, we know why we are doing it. We want attention and appreciation for our body.
(4) Would the outfit cover temple garments, if you wore them? One of the purposes of the temple garment is to protect our modesty. If your outfit would not cover a temple garment, it is by definition immodest. Sometimes, it may be appropriate to wear such an outfit in special circumstances. On the other hand, wearing the exact same outfit outside of those special circumstances would be imodest. For example, it may be acceptable to wear a modest swim suit to swim, even though the swim suit would not cover temple garments. But it would be immodest to wear your swimming suit to go shopping at the mall or to a party.
Notes:
(1) It should be noted that two piece swimming suits (i.e., "bikinis") are not allowed in the swimming areas of Church-sponsored colleges like Brigham Young University and Ricks College.
One of the hardest things for many of you is modesty. How can we apply the spiritual power of our baptism to the principle of modesty? We hope one of the things that makes you different from the world is the way you dress. Marcie Matthews, a Laurel from Chicago, Illinois, shares her story:
"1998 was a year that I was able to see the results of many Young Women lessons, talks, and advice come into play. I am an average Mormon girl. Being able to keep my life this steady and strong has not been easy. I make goals all the time to help strengthen my testimony and my standards.
"Recently we had a Mutual activity on the importance of modesty. Every lesson before I felt like I was a modest dresser, but I knew there was still something I could change--my shorts and the length of my skirts. It was the one weakness that I knew I had but had placed far behind in my head. Everyone wore short shorts, Daisy Dukes, and miniskirts, and I had bought mine with my own money. Then I heard the lesson on modesty. I went home wanting to go straight to my closet and throw away everything that was not modest so it wouldn't be there to tempt me. After, I told my parents. I guess I was looking for them to tell me that there was no problem in the way I dressed and then let me go.
"Later that night my dad told me he was proud of me and that he would like to buy me a couple of knee-length dresses for church. The next step was to go through all my clothes and give away everything. It was hard for me to part with my favorite skirts and the shorts that I loved so much, but I did. You will never see me in short shorts or short skirts again.
"I have never felt better about myself. I love being able to walk into the temple and church and feel like I am a child of God and am representing Him . . . by the clothes that I wear.
"I challenge every young woman to take this step. It will help you find out who you are and what you stand for. When we have to give up something that is a part of us, the blessings will pour in more than you can imagine" (letter in possession of Young Women office).
Marcie's great example epitomizes our Young Women theme. You know, the part that says, "We stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things"--and in all prom dresses.
For Sister Thomas' full comments, see Spiritual Power of our Baptism
by President Spencer W. Kimball
Dress modestly. You girls go and find the modest clothes and wear them, make them as beautiful as you can and be attractive and make up to your boyfriends in bright intellect and sweet spirit and attractive demeanor that which some girls can only do with their bodies. It is a pretty weak girl if she has only her body to attract somebody.
Any young woman who conducts herself so as to be attractive spiritually, mentally, and physically, but will not by word, nor dress, nor act stir or stimulate to physical reactions, she is a jewel.
Stylish clothes can be modest. You can always be in style and still be modest. I have never seen a style yet in my many years that one couldn't follow and still be modest. ...
Our girls ... don't need to be backwoods, neither do they need to dress like a harlot. There is a nice medium place where everybody can dress well. When dresses are long, you can wear them long; and when they are flaring, you can wear them flaring; and when they are short, you can wear them short; but you don't need to outdo everybody in getting them short. ...
If you want to stay in the realm of modest womanhood, you keep your body covered and no decent man will ever think less of you for it and every good, honorable man who would think of marrying you would love you more for it. ...
There is no time when a Latter-day Saint woman should wear a strapless gown. They are not righteous nor approved.
Modesty is for men, also. Now just a word to the boys. Sometimes we have young men, they swim scantily clad, of course, when they are in the water, that's all right. Sometimes they play games, basketball, for instance, with very, very little on them. Maybe that's all right on the basketball floor, but certainly it is immodest for them to go around dating before and after the game in those kinds of clothes. It is just as bad for a man to be undressed as it is for a woman to be undressed and that, I am sure, is the gospel of Christ. We have only one standard of morality, only one standard of decency, only one standard of modesty, and I hope our men will remember that. There is no reason why a man should go around half dressed either before the people.
Extreme styles betray character weakness. Our young people should know also that it is hard for them to hide their upbringing, their inner thoughts, their weaknesses. There is nothing criminal about grammatical errors or careless speech or even slang. But such do reveal the character of the user and reflect upon his home life. It may be an unwarranted and weak demand for attention which one feels powerless to stir otherwise. The chewing of gum in public certainly gives no suggestion of culture or refinement and certainly will not build confidence in or esteem for the one who indulges. Inappropriate clothes, extreme makeup, fantastic hairdos, gum chewing, slang, ugly speech, bad table manners, and other such irregularities brand the individual at once as weak, uncouth, cheap or careless, and thoughtless, and his family is judged by his weaknesses. ...
Boys seldom criticize a girl for using too little makeup. Sometimes they say, "She's a nice girl, but I wish she'd dress up, and she uses too much makeup." To be overdressed, to be gaudily dressed, to be dressed to look sexy, to be overdecorated is bad taste, to say the least. The young woman is smart who can don just enough powder and lipstick to convince the fellows it isn't makeup at all, but the "real you."
Perhaps there is no transgression in painted eyelids or dangling earrings or fancy hairdos, but surely all these eccentricities and extremes betray character. Her life is open like a book, and people read it. There may be no harm in the style itself, but it may indicate some weakness, some insecurity, some unsureness.
Young men should keep their faces shaved, their hair combed, their haircuts reasonably conservative, their nails cleaned. Overtight, suggestive pants brand young men as vulgar. Young people can be smart and personable, dignified and attractive by finding an area somewhere less than the extremes and still in good style. ...
There may be nothing wrong with an extreme crew cut or a beard or for one to cover his forehead "Beatle" style and let the hair grow long all around, but he is opening his book for the world to read, and employers and other thoughtful people may bypass the eccentric and the extremist in his distortion and abnormalities to find those who are stylish in moderation and who are dignified, for here is an indication of depth and width and strength.
The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, p.285-7
Copyright by Bookcraft
Other things besides cars and darkness encourage unchastity and immorality. One of them is immodesty. The young people today seem to talk about sex glibly. They hear it in the locker rooms and on the street, they see and hear it in shows and on television, they read it in the pornographic books everywhere. Those who do not resist this influence absorb and foster it. The spirit of immodesty has developed until nothing seems to be sacred.
One factor contributing to immodesty and the breakdown of moral values is the modern dress worn by our young women and their mothers. I see young women, and some older ones, on the streets wearing shorts. This is not right. The place for women to wear shorts is in their rooms, in their own homes, in their own gardens. I see some of our LDS mothers, wives, and daughters wearing dresses extreme and suggestive in style. Even some fathers encourage it. I wonder if our sisters realize the temptation they are flaunting before men when they leave their bodies partly uncovered or dress in tight-fitting, body-revealing, form-fitting sweaters.
There is no reason why a woman needs to wear an immodest gown because it is the style. We can be in style yet not be extreme. We can create styles of our own. A woman is most beautiful when her body is properly clothed and her sweet face adorned with her lovely hair. She needs no more attractions. Then she is at her best and men will love her for it. Men will not love her more because her neck is bare. Girls, if the young man is decent and worthy of you, he will love you the more when you are properly dressed. Of course, if he is a vicious man he will have other ideas.
It would almost seem that some phases of immodesty in dress, in both men and women, border on exhibitionism, the perverted behavior in which people satisfy their lustful desires in displaying their bodies to others. One has indeed slipped a long way down the ladder when he resorts to this detestable expression, though fortunately he can regenerate and restore and transform himself with total repentance, and can be forgiven. Still, no one but a depraved person could approve of the practice or grant its acceptance.
But is this ugly displaying of one's private body to others so far removed from those instances of men who do their yard work wearing only pants and shoes, and those who drive about in cars with the upper part of their bodies uncovered? Is this exhibitionism so different and far removed from that of those young and older women who resort to wearing tight-fitting clothes which accentuate the human body, and those who show their backs and bosoms and lower limbs? Style is blamed for these extremes, but we wonder again if there might not be some satisfactions, sexual and otherwise, in what seems a wanton disregard of modest decency. Are the very scant bathing suits worn for style or to shock or stir or tempt? Can there be in all these expressions total innocence and total modesty? There are laws against indecent exposure, but why jail the man who exhibits his body so very little more than the women who show so little less? Is it possible that in all these immodesties there might be at least some of the same desires which prompt the exhibitionist to uncover his body and flaunt it before people?
We cannot overemphasize immodesty as one of the pitfalls to be avoided if we would shun temptation and keep ourselves clean.
The Miracle of Forgiveness, p.227
Copyright by Bookcraft
Another of the many things that lead to unchastity is immodesty. Today many young women and young men are smug in their knowledge of the facts of life. They think they know all the answers. They talk about sex as freely as they talk about cars and shows and clothes. And a spirit of immodesty has developed until nothing seems to be sacred.
One contributing factor to immodesty and a breakdown of moral values is the modern dress. I am sure that the immodest clothes that are worn by some of our young women, and their mothers, contribute directly and indirectly to the immorality of this age. Even fathers sometimes encourage it. I wonder if our young sisters realize the temptation they are flaunting before young men when they leave their bodies partly uncovered. They frequently wear short skirts and body-revealing blouses and sweaters that seem to be worn to draw attention to the form of the girl and to emphasize sexuality.
The newspapers frequently carry pictures of immodestly dressed people. There has grown up a deplorable exploitation of young women in queen contests. Practically every school, industry, political subdivision, celebration, and class must have a queen. There are queens for every vegetable, fruit, farm product, until it is ludicrous. Surely it can no longer be much of a distinction to be one of the numerous queens. The multiplicity of queens reigning over every act and adventure and project of men reminds us of the gods of Greece and Rome, with a different god for every need and interest. Are any queen contests ever organized for the actual benefit of the young women? Such contests are programs of exploitation whereby business people and other agencies may receive publicity and sell their wares. You may be sure that none of the organizers or promoters have in mind the development of character, the building of faith, or the teaching of cleanliness or chastity for the young women. Because of the publicity, they can offer alluring prizes and give much notoriety to the unsuspecting and popularity-hungry young women.
The flattery of the contest is deceptive and frequently destructive to the queen. Vanity of young women and their families induces and encourages them to enter such contests.
Woe unto them that draw iniquity with cords of vanity, and sin as it were with a cart rope. (Isaiah 5:18.)
A newspaper described the standards for a queen contest:
Judging of contestants is based on personality, appearance in an evening gown, appearance in a bathing suit, and talent.
Not a single word is written suggesting character, modesty, worthiness, integrity, or humility as basis for winning.
Ten finalists in the Miss _______________ contest Wednesday night will make their last talent and beauty parade before the eyes of the judges and crowd at the State Fair…. Just how good a figure does Miss _____________ have? That's a question that may be settled without difficulty Wednesday night. The girl will appear in the pageant opening preliminary contest dressed in a bathing suit.
Why does a girl dress in a bathing suit in a contest? Isn't this a terrific and shameful price for popularity and to be crowned queen? Does she like being exploited? There are eyes of many men, some vulgar and lewd, who want to see that body, too, and judges and crowds appraise it; and so our naive young women dress in very skimpy bathing suits and parade before lustful eyes.
I cannot believe any of our young women would choose to display their sacred bodies to lecherous eyes. I am sure it is the glamour of the contest, the possibility of winning, and lure of the prizes and alleged opportunities that blind their eyes to the reality of the sacrilege. May I quote a few lines from a brother who feels just as I do and just as your prophets seem to feel. After attending one of the games at a western university he wrote:
It was a demonstration of baton twirling. Immediately the atmosphere changed. The girls in glittering drum majorette costumes marched onto the playing field. The costumes were of the briefest, leaving the girls nude from the hips down, with tight and form-revealing clothes scantily covering their torsos. In these garbs, patterned after burlesque show costumes, they came onto the field, and there in the glare of the afternoon sun they gyrated and pirouetted in the eyes of the huge crowd of spectators.
I am sure that the baton twirling of the girls calls for considerable skill, but I am at a loss to see any relationship between it and the exhibitionism that went along with it. The wolf whistles, the other exclamations, which rose from the student bleachers on the east side of the stadium where both cheering sections were seated, were not a tribute to artistic skill. I sat in the public bleachers of the west side, and the experience was acutely embarrassing to me. I am sure that these girls are virtuous, sincere and wholesome, but I cannot think that they would have been either pleased or flattered by the snickers, the suggestive exclamations and the lewd comments which filled the air around me as they performed their act.
We must be different when there is a right and wrong. We need not do anything we do not wish to do. We can create our own styles and standards for costumes. We can also control or influence the patterns in many of our schools and help to develop proper community patterns.
Another quotation from a Seattle paper several years ago: "A scholarly research job at the University of Washington was called off Wednesday because parents objected to the photographing of their daughters in the nude." Thank God for some courageous and sensitive people in that great city. "Scholarly research job!" My, to what extent have we gone! How low we sink to do scholarly work sometimes!
Now, let us consider briefly the wearing of an evening gown. These can be made to fit the body and properly clothe it and can be most beautiful. The Lord gave to our first parents clothes to cover their bodies. We are sure that he is unhappy to see his daughters displaying their sacred bodies in immodest gowns. At least some of the desires fulfilled in the selection of these gowns are not holy ones. Why does a woman wish to wear immodest gowns? Is it to please and allure men? Is it to follow fashion? I am certain that there has not been preconceived evil thought in the minds of most of our young people, but the harm can be done regardless of intent.
There is no reason why women need to wear a low-cut or otherwise revealing gown just because it is the worldly style. We can create a style of our own. I know women who have worn evening gowns through the years and yet have never worn an immodest one, and they have purchased them from the stores. I believe most shops carry in stock the dresses the trade demands.
A woman is most beautiful when her body is clothed and her sweet face is adorned with her lovely hair. She needs no more attractions. Then she is at her best, and men will love her for it. And men will not love her more because her neck or back is bare. Young women, if he is decent and worthy of you he will love you more when you are properly dressed! Of course, if he is a corrupt man, an immodestly dressed woman will please him.
There seems to be a pattern that many young women follow of having their pictures taken with a very low-necked dress, so low, in fact, that bust pictures hardly show any clothing. I see such pictures on pianos and dressers in homes. I have seen them on the tables of missionaries in far-off South America and in Europe. Surely it could be only thoughtlessness that could account for this.
Even newspapers carrying announcements of temple marriages carry also pictures that could hardly be pleasing to our Lord. I quote you from a metropolitan newspaper: "Marriage ceremonies will be solemnized in the Salt Lake Temple, uniting Miss _____________ and Mr. _________________ From the accompanying bust picture of the young woman, no clothes could be seen!
If the young women are thoughtless in the matter, certainly their elders—the mothers, sisters, and aunts—should give proper guidance.
We knew of one mother who remonstrated with her lovely daughter who intended to buy a modest evening gown. The mother pleaded: "Darling, now is the time to show your pretty shoulders and back and neck. When you are married in the temple that will be time enough to begin wearing conservative clothes." What can be expected of the new generation if the mothers lead their own offspring from the path of right?
Neither is there excuse for young men to bare and expose their bodies. The fellows could show courage and good judgment if they encouraged their young women friends to wear modest clothing. If a young man would not date a young woman who is improperly clothed, the style would change very soon.
I am positive that the immodest clothing worn does have a marked influence upon morals. A police official in an [Eastern city remarked: ". . . the brutal fact we have to face is that more and more American women are unwittingly inviting sex crimes…. " He writes further: "The peculiarly American system of encouraging our girls to be attractive and alluring, of training them to be seductive and then, of course, they must draw an uncrossable line—that system may be carrying the seeds of its own destruction. How many well-meaning mothers send their daughters out, dressed to be tempting eyefuls? How many mothers actually teach their daughters to be 'teasers?' . . . The entire concept of training our young women to lure and repel simultaneously sets up irreconcilable conflicts.
Who will young women, virtuous in intent, set up in dress and otherwise an appearance of daring sexual willingness? Says this writer: "We pray for a generation of girls who will display their wit, their intelligence, their modest charm, their integrity, their loveliness rather than their bodies and their sexual possibilities."
I am positive that the clothes we wear can be a tremendous factor in the gradual breakdown of our love of virtue, our steadfastness in chastity.
The Lord has promised to the valiant, "All that I have is thine." To reach these lofty heights and limitless blessings, you must take no chances. Keep your lives sweet and clean and pure, so that there will never be any forfeiture. To do this, you will do well to avoid "the very appearance of evil" and "the very approach toward evil."
"He that hath ears to hear, let him hear."
Faith Precedes the Miracle, p.164
Copyright by Bookcraft
Modesty in dress is one of the identifying characteristics of true saints. It is an aid in preserving chastity and an outward sign that the modest person is imbued with humility, decency, and propriety. Immodesty in dress is worldly, excites passions and lusts, places undue emphasis on sex and lewdness, and frequently encourages and invites petting and other immoral practices. It is an outward sign that the immodest person has become hardened to the finer sensitivities of the Spirit and been overcome by a spirit of vanity and pride. Low-necked dresses and those which do not adequately cover the body, for instance, are obviously destructive of decency.
Extremes of dress of any kind are of doubtful propriety. Costly and elaborate clothing in general is anything but indicative that the wearer has overcome the world and is walking humbly before the Lord. On the other hand old-fashioned somber, uniform-type clothing worn by fanatical members of some small religious sects is wholly unbecoming in our modern society. Such habits of dress indicate a lack of understanding of sound and true principles of modesty.
Speaking as moved upon by the Spirit, Paul counseled "that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works." (1 Tim. 2:9-10.) In our day the Lord has spoken similarly: "Thou shalt not be proud in thy heart; let all thy garments be plain, and their beauty the beauty of the work of thine own hands." (D. & C. 42:40.)
Mormon Doctrine, p.510
Copyright by Bookcraft
When strong young priesthood holders see a girl immodestly dressed, most will not want to date her because her standards are not consistent with their eternal perspective. Immodesty in women cheapens their image. It causes embarrassment and loss of respect. It is not likely to win them the hand of a worthy, honorable young man who desires to marry a righteous young woman in the temple. You young ladies may have a hard time buying a modest prom dress. May I suggest that you make your own? You may need some help, but plenty of help is available. (See Womanhood: The Highest Place of Honor for President Faust's full comments)
(See Daily Living home page)
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